1-31-2011 Time is running out
I had a little break down today at work. I was riled up and I couldn't control it. My
nerves were just shaking inside. I didn't know if I could handle this. I went to happy
hour to get my nerves down. We decided to go since traffic was pretty bad with the
snow storm.

1-30-2011 Troubles
I have been having troubles with my anxiety again lately. I had  a hard time controlling
it. I wish I didn't have troubles being sometimes. I feel like there is always something
with me. I wish I was perfectly healthy sometimes. No allergies, no injuries. Just
perfect. I guess I should be happy with the way I am.

1-29-2011 Pants off dance off
This was not even close to the original pants off dance off. First of all the people
were way different. It wasn't about having a good time with each other anymore.
Sadly, I am sure this will be the last of it. Those days are long gone. I had a good time
though. I dragged Andy to go with me. It was a lot of fun at the 508 club. A lot of
good looking woman and good atmosphere.

1-28-2011 Bowling sub
I bowled at the lat minute for Lindseys team. I bowled pretty well. 151, 188, 170. Or
something like that. I don't remember to be quite honest. All I know is that we bowled
well enough to possibly win. It was a pretty drunken night. I forget how much my
tolerance has gone down. It sure was nice to see everyone again. I do miss that part
the most.

1-27-2011 Diamond League??
I have been trying my hardest to get into Diamond league for starcraft 2. I want to
be part of the elite company. Sure, some people were able to get into it right away. I
had to work from the bottom. Story of my life I guess. I am ever so close. jJust a few
more wins and I gotta hope they put me in that league.

1-26-2011 Bed arrival
After work today. Me and Danielle went to Woodbury to pick up my future bed. The
lady asked us to come back another 15 minutes on the phone. I guess she wanted to wait
for her husband to get home. i totally understand it was a security thing. Their house
was so perfect. I have to admit. I have never seen a house so perfect in my life. It
was flawless. It was like I was in a model home or at a set in ikea or something.

1-25-2011 Craigslist anyone?
I sold my bed on craigslist today. It was a sad day for me. That bed has been in my
possession for over the past 7 years. I remember like it was yesterday. I was  living
with my sister in Osseo. Betsy, who was used to play kickball. Was getting rid of her
old bed. Her and Nate dropped it off years ago. I held onto that bed when I lived their,
back home and to my new home. Even though it was a hand me down. It was probably a 15
year old bed. It began to sink in and lost its comfort. Its a sealy bed if anyone cares.
Just to let you know it lasted a long time. I am getting a new bed tomorrow. Time to
move on.

1-24-2011 Bowling dominance?
Tonight at bowling. I didn't know if I was going to bowl well. With my shoulder sore
from dodgeball and my ankle still not a 100 percent. I felt i was gonna struggle. I shot
out of the gates with a score of 178. 218 and a 108. Yes, a 108 and I was trying. My
arm got tired and i was just trying my best to throw it down the lane.

1-23-2011 Pack and Steelers advance
I went to brunch with Erin at the Egg and I. Which is a nice little place. The food
wasn't too bad. I would go there again.

I watched the Packers beat a Bears team that had no offense what so ever. I was a bit
disappointed the Bears played horribly. The Steelers advanced, so I am happy they beat
the Jets. Now if I can get the Steelers to polish off the Pack. I am heavily annoyed
all the Packer fans are boasting about their trip to the Super bowl.

1-22-2011 Sore as hell
I decided to give my ankle a test. I went to play dodge ball, even though my ankle
wasn't anything near 100%. I was tired of just sitting around. I did the best I could.
I struggled moving obviously. I had trouble planting my foot when I throw. iIs amazing
how much mechanics there are for throwing. I couldn't even catch. I was dropping
everything.

1-21-2011 No regrets the past 10 years
I have been doing a lot of thinking the past week. With my 30th birthday coming in
about 2 months. I had a chance to reflect and think back about my 20's. I was too
young to remember my childhood. From 1 to 10. Of, course I remember bits and pieces. I
hated my teen life, from 11 to 20. I just got by on life. My 20's was when I finally
became who I was supposed to be. I met a lot of great friends. Worked various jobs.
Did and saw a lot of things. I went through various dating arrangements. Whether they
were good or bad. I had always been searching. I have no regrets bout all those girls I
spent all that time with. With 30 coming, I decided I wanted to go bigger and badder
then my 20's. I am winding down and I realize I will need to step up my search for
that girl.  Start a family and watching my kids grow. Thats my plan for my 30's.

1-20-2011 Healing
my ankle felt pretty good today. I was still hobbling, but not as bad today. I was a bit
worried for awhile there. A full week with out it getting better scared me.

We went out to Tajeban for Marios bday dinner. Its a mexican restaurant near his
house. It was fun, I was just making fun of the girls all night.

1-19-2011 People
I have been pretty upset with a lot of people lately. Mostly friends. I know as we grow
older we find it harder to spend time. Its frustrating how I watch people who are in a
bottomless pit just sit there and don't do anything about it. Then to come off rude to
me when I am trying to pick your ass up. I don't get it. Sometimes you jsut need to be
a man and go do it.

1-18-2011 Lots of ice
I went to Benihanas today for lunch with Jamie. It was so nice to catch up and eat
food. Its kinda funny. I have had chinese two days in a row it seems.

I heavily iced my ankle today. I think this may be a long recovery back. I have decided
to rule my self out for volleyball tomorrow. For me to miss a game in any sport is huge.
Since many of you know. i will play through any injury.

1-17-2011 Sushi buffet
Me and Joe went to this Sushi buffet. Well it was a regular chinese buffet with sushi.
It just opened about 2 weeks ago. Its pretty big and there is about 3 aisles of food.
It wasn't too bad, but it wasn't anything spectacular either. The sushi was very
average at best. We kind of sat around at chat. Oh and Phil was there too. The wait
staff their was a bit too overly polite. i was kind of annoyed. She said "Excuse me" for
every sentence. I already forgot what its called, but its on the corner of University
and Marion.

1-16-2011 Bad ankle
Luckily I had nothing going on this weekend. I can barely move with my ankle hurting so
bad. I noticed its towards my Achilles. I seem to have been having a lot of trouble with
that lately. It sure isn't healing as quick as i would hoped. I may be out for a few
weeks.

Its been pretty lonely the past few days. I have been sitting home. Something I
couldn't do for the past 10 years. Finally I have been able to do it. No more cabin
fever feeling.

1-15-2011 Falcons party
Well I didn't exactly have a Falcons party, but i was trying to piss off all those
packer friends of mine. Andy and Jen did make a visit. We ordered papa Johns pizza.
Which was the first time I have ever ordered pizza at my place.

Today was one of those days I needed to just sit back and do nothing. It was good for
me. For once I can say. I did nothing all weekend.

1-14-2011 Pay day
Don't you hate it when you get paid, but you can't spend any of it cause it goes all to
bills. Well thats the cause for me. I did my math and I realistically only have $200 to
spend till the next pay check. I got a lot of bills to pay and I figure this weekend
would be a good weekend to stay in. Sigh, grown up life. I sure miss those days when I
was 21 and had lots of money. Hell two years ago.

1-13-2011 Walking troubles
I had a pretty noticeable limp today. I couldn't walk on my left foot at all. I am
unsure what kind of injury this one is. Out of all the foot injuries I have had, this one
feels different. I am unsure where it actually hurts. I sure took a beating the past
few days.

Today also is the start of my new healthy 2011. It isn't anything dramatic. Just very
healthy food and not over eating and less wheat. Lets hope I get into the biggest shape
of my life when I turn 30 this year.

1-12-2011 A new list
Tonight we lost all three games at volleyball. I feel we need a 6th person against
these teams. I got home and I was battered and bruised. I took and accidental elbow
from Chad right in the mouth. The bleeding went away and the game continued. My ankle
was hurting too for some reason. I was a beaten man, and I wasn't happy about it. The
2nd game we blew a lead. It was not a good night.

Every year I create a list and thats my things to do for that year. It started two
years ago actually. Wow, how time flies. I think I will have it written in a few days.

1-11-2011 Nothing new
I was planning on going out tonight, but I guess things don't pan out. I decided to just
do something I know where I can help out on. Its been a long 2010. I have to start a
new and enjoy 2011. What a year it was looking back.

1-10-2011 Bowling part time
I went bowling at Park tavern tonight. Matt asked me to play in his league. With it
being a 7 person roster. I can bowl part time and not have to deal with going every
week. Which makes me happy. I don't think i can handle a full schedule anymore. I
bowled purposely like shit. Only to keep my average low.

1-09-2011 Recovery
Today was pretty much my recovery day. I was tired and not in the mood to really do
anything. After hearing about much everyone lost. I guess this is why we don't make
these trips often.

With my bank account lately. I am just not happy with  how it looks. This year will be
about saving and being efficient. I want to get out of debt and I realized my party
days are in the latter side of my life.

1-08-2011 Diamon Jo's casino trip
We all met at the mid way point at Spikes in Faribault. We had a total count of 44
people I believe. It might have gone higher who knows. Mike was able to get us a free
buffet, which I thought was pretty cool. Since I got the suite. My room was the party
room. I didn't gamble till later int he night. I was ahead $18. All I played was a little
video poker and Super jackpot party. It was definitely a late night. I went to bed at
5:30am. Others still were awake. It was a wild night, people getting kicked out of the
casino. The hotel threatening to call the sheriff. It was crazy times. Most important.
I got to catch up with friends.

1-07-2011 Night in
Today was pretty much a anti climatic day. There wasn't really too much going on. I
went to pho today with the moms and it was pretty good. Tomorrow is the big casino
tripped that, Me, Mike, Heidi , Chad and Danielle planned. I am happy we got such a big
group to go. I stayed in tonight to save money. I want to go all out tomorrow.

1-06-2011 Quiet night
I was pretty tired tonight. I really wanted to just lay around and watch tv. Erika was
working on her homework. She was working on her portfolio for her class. My eyes were
very dry and I had a hard time keeping them open all night. I dosed off eventually.
Right into the night.

1-05-2011 Double header
Tonight we play the upper tier teams in our league. I didn't know what to expect from
us tonight. I wanted to win both of them. Ours first team we played against. A old
rival of ours(solid) We Won the first one and loss the 2nd. WE fought for the 3rd
game and won it pretty easily. The 2nd team we played, we beat them easily the first
game and lost the 2nd and 3rd games. I was disappointed we were unable to beat the
2nd team. They were better then the first, but we shot our selves in the foot. I tried
to hard and make mistakes tonight

1-04-2011 The motion
Today I went to the St paul bagelry to get a bunch of bagels. It was for Mario's
birthday today. I ate 2 and a half bagels. A bit too much for me I think. I had a tough
time controlling the hunger.

I looked at my bank account today and I have a few bills over due plus one of my credit
cards is in collection. I will be receiving calls soon.  They are so annoying but I have
gotten careless the past 4 years.

1-03-2011 Busy work
I was very busy at work today. I don't know why, but it seems like people are just
returning stuff or just have issues with their orders. Of course they are never simple
things. Made me very busy today. I better go into work early tomorrow to catch up
some more.

1-02-2011 Vikings
It was a sad end to a horrible season. This was a bad season. No good bye Brett
nothing. Only leads me to believe he will be back for one more. I feel I have his mind
set. The ego maniac personality. I feel if he was done. He would have had a big press
conference. He did not. So he will be back next year.

1-01-2011 New Years day
I learned something new this year. For once in my life. I wasn't hoping for much of
change. I am content with my life the way it is. I have my home, good friends, a working
car, job is alright, girlfriend, well kinda.
“For having lived long, I have experienced
many instances of being obliged, by better
information or fuller consideration, to
change opinions, even on important
subjects, which I once thought right but
found to be otherwise.”
Journal
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