11-30-07 Today we all went to go eat at Applebees. I guess Mario was craving steak. So we had
steak, Andy came with too, since he was working a full 8 hours today instead of his normal part
time gig at night. I was fighting of urges of not drinking pop. I have done great. I still get
occasional headaches. I feel a bit lighter. So far so good. I am going to buy some of those
powdered flavored drinks. Supposedly more healthy. I got home and I was feeling a bit tired. I
was getting headaches again. I drove out to Brunswick zone in brooklyn park. i was meeting up
with everyone for bowling. It was kind of funny them having a rule that nobody can wear hats
after 7pm. I guess thats how ghetto it is there. I sucked the first game, but the 2nd game I
marked every frame. We thought about playing laser tag, it was busy so we passed on it. I was
tired so i went home early.
11-29-07 I felt sore this morning, my quads hurt a bit. Nothing to bad though, thats what I get
for not stretching. Today was cold out. I was pretty busy today. I couldn't remember things
and I had to use a white board to write down all the things I was doing so I wouldn't forget. Me
and Mario went to Subway today. I was eating healthy again, since I am pop free. I had to drink
rasberry iced tea. Since all the other options were pop. It wasn't too bad but I can sort of feel
the difference now. I still get headaches every now and then, but I don't think thats from lack
of caffeine. I went to rosedale to do some shopping. I didn't really find anything I wanted to get
for anyone. I just don't feel like shopping when its not snowing. I went to have dinner tonight
with Katie. We tried to goto joe Sensors, but it was way to busy. So we went to Fridays instead.
I guess there is a new bartender there. Usually I know them all. It was fun I had a blast. i drank
more then I should have. i have been good all week anyways, so I deserved it.
11-28-07 It wasn't as cold as yesterday, but it was even colder. I dropped my car off at Tires
Plus today for an oil change. They had to take longer then normal so I walked to work in the
cold. It was freezing, I could feel the cold air blasting into my face. I was fighting a head ache all
day. I havn't had this many head aches in a week span in a long time. I don't show any signs of
getting sick or anything. So i am not sure whats going on. I ate healthy again today. I had a
wrap and still no pop what so ever. The head ache thing is a pain right now. It was busy at work
today too, so it wasn't on my side right now. I drove to Blaine. Tonight was our first volleyball
game of the season. I wasn't sure what to expect to tell you the truth. We lost 17 to 25, 21 to
25 and 14 to 25. The other team was just way better. We played great though. I think we will
probably be put in to the better tier of teams. We shall see how it goes. We went to
Blainebrook bowl for drinks. Sounds like its going to be lots of fun. I am glad we did this.
11-27-07 Its hard to believe that its almost December already. It sure felt like the winter season.
It was freezing this morning. Normally I just say cold, but it was freezing. I am going to have to
bust out the gloves and scarf soon. The health plan went according to plan today. I ate my
sandwich and chips and I didn't drink any pop what so ever at all. I feel a bit lighter, but I know I
got a long way to go. I was going to go watch a movie tonight. For some reason I kinda want
to go watch "Enchanted", gay I know, but thats what I used to do is watch those types of
movies. I watched the biggest loser today. I don't know why that show intrigues me so much.
Well, what ever the reason. It helps me sit at home and not go out and about. Tomorrow is
going to be pretty exciting. Well not really, I have to wake up early to drop my car off at Tires
Plus for an oil change. Then walk in the cold to work. I have stayed off lifting weights. I like the
thinner look then the bulky look. Things are going to get real busy for me soon. With bowling
Mondays and volleyball Wednesdays, I am going to be so tired.
11-26-07 Side effects of bing on medication. Lets see, sleepiness, drowsiness and maybe not
being hungry. Well thats how I felt this morning. It seemed to make me want to work harder
though. So i guess thats a good thing. We went to Panera bread for lunch. I had a sandwich
but I was still feeling a bit hungry. I had some of Danielle's cesar salad and it was just disgusting.
It tasted like fish or anchovies. I normally don't taste that. Just an FYI for someone. I got home
and made pork loin and gravy. It was probably one of my best dishes to date. I also made a
side consisting of potatoes, carrots, celery, salt, pepper, garlic, cheese, lemon juice, butter,
jalapenos, herbs and some cream. It was awesome. I totally got fat tonight eating so much. I
watched my favorite tv shows tonight. It was just nice to catch up on everything. I am not
sure why, but something hit me tonight. I just decided for the first time in a long time. I am
very content with my life. I am happy with my surroundings and my friends. Later on this
evening. I had a chance to talk to Evelyn. Not much has changed for her. Still not engaged yet.
I am sure shes lying to me though. It was a nice friendly chat. I have evolved from the rough
11-25-07 Gosh, I just have the sickest feeling lately in my stomach. I am not sure what to eat
anymore. I woke up just in time for the Vikings game today. i guess I was the only one thinking
maybe they would blow this big lead. Somehow they managed to score 3 defensive
touchdowns. I went to the Legion to test my poker skills since I have been on fire as of late. I
got 3rd place there too, basically paying for my drinks. I went to the Vfw for bingo, but there
was no bingo when I got there. Played some darts, I like playing darts surprisingly. Went to the
Bluefox after that. Its just nice when your friends hit big on pull tabs. You get more free drinks
that way. I have just been exhausted though. I went to Cub foods to do late night shopping. i
don't know why, but I enjoy my alone time walking around there. This week I will be making
Broccoli cheese soup. Since that is another favorite of mine. I just love the holiday season.
11-24-07 I was laying in bed since 2am. I could not sleep at all. So eventually I got out of bed at
around 5am. I was looking at stores to shop at since I knew a few of the stores are still opening
early at 6am. I decided to pass on it and made breakfast and laid back in bed and finally I fell
asleep around 8am. I woke up at noon again and I was trying to get out of the house. I was
feeling sick just being in there. I was dehydrated and I needed something. Well i ended up going
to walmart and I was looking for some toys for the nephews. Plus I needed to get some
headache pills. I had Apple bees today I have been craving it for weeks now. I wasn't sure if it
was going to settle. Since nothing has been settling in my tummy lately. I went to the VFW to
play cards tonight. I just wanted to do something low key and close to home. I was expecting
to lose early so I could go home and sleep. I actually end up getting 3rd place. I was firing on
every cylinder. I drove up to Wyoming, Mn. Katie was up at some bar up there and Chris came
too. Good thing i was able to mapquest it with my phone. My head ache was flaring up again.
So I went home. Its just been bugging me alot lately.
11-23-07 Andy called and wanted to go out or lunch since Fred was in town. We went to the
Hoggsbreath and I got food and beer. I had a cajun chicken wrap, and it was decent, not the
best. We played Silver Strike and darts afterwards. We had to throw on one foot since Fred was
on crutches. Once again i get of to an early start and I can't hit the bulls eye to win the game. I
went over to Andys to play Maddens afterwards. I was starting to get a bad head ache and
starting to feel sick. I didn't end up going out and I barely got home. I ended up puking outside.
I saw the food I had this afternoon and the Hoggs. I blame it all on food at the Hoggs. My head
ache was just bothering me so much i had no choice but to lay my head down and goto sleep.
So I was in bed by around 8pm. I woke up early though at around 2am and I couldn't go back
11-22-07 I woke up early and went to my sisters house to pick up my nephews. I was going to
put them to work this year and help cook. Ofcourse I had to bribe them with video games, but
its a good lie right. It was typical thanks giving dinner. We had two turkeys this year. One was
roasted in a slow cooker and the other was deep fried. I don't think i did such a good job with
the deep fried turkey this year. I should have cooked it longer, but the marinade might have
saved the day. I was feeling so tired, I am just not used to getting up early. I got home and I
was basically just watching season one of The office. i didn't feel like going out so I just laid low
and rested up. I have not been feeling well lately. I can't put too much pressure on my foot yet,
so I just want to keep off of it for awhile.
11-21-07 Since this is supposed to be Friday, but close enough since its the day before turkey
day. It sure felt like it. I wanted the day to be over with as soon as possible. My mind was on eat
and cooking. I couldn't think of anything else. Plus there was the plan of going out tonight. I
wasn't sure what was going on. Since it is supposedly the busiest drinking day of the year.
Tonight, we all went to Danielle's and they made us dinner. It was very good. We went to
Monte's since Pickle park seemed to be really busy. I was feeling pretty good since I had a
couple captains at the house. My foot is still bothering me, so when I am moving around its
slowing me down. Chad played the wheel and he always seems to win at it. I knew I had to get
up early so I called it an early night. I got home and I saw so many people pulled over and cops
hiding all over the place. It was just crazy.
11-20-07 With all the pain in my foot. i was unable to sleep last night. It was just awful, just like
when I was in Ny and I had this issue. I don't know what I do to make it flare up like this. it was
so bad today. I could not even walk. Later on that day. I took more Ibpofun and I attempted
to get out of the house. Susan picked me up and we went to Majors. I actually was not feeling
to hungry for some odd reason. I think the meds were taking over and I just couldn't eat. Even
though the food smelt great. I was unable to walk to the car, so she was going to just pick me
up on the side walk. I declined and just used every ounce of energy to get to the car. I guess
my alpha male side came out and wanted to show how tough I was. We picked up coffee for
Katie and dropped it off at her work. I got home and I was just tired i laid in bed and I was
looking up information on webmd.com. I was making my deep fried turkey marinade since I will
be injecting all the juices of it into the turkey Thursday. Typical flavors are cajun style, but I
wanted it to have a garlic feel too it with spice of course. Its going to be the best deep fried
11-19-07 I had the worst feeling in my foot today. i have noticed lately that I seem to get this
foot pain before. It just lingers for 2 or 3 days then it goes away. I was limping all over the place
today. I had lunch with Joey today. We went to Arbys, we needed to do some catching up.
seems like everyone needs advise as of late. After work today i go home and i was so tired. It
made something exciting tonight. I have never made meatloaf before. So I gave it a go and it
turned out just right. It just seems as of late that I have been making all of my favorite dishes. I
can't wait to see how everyone tastes it tomorrow I am going to bring it to work and see how it
goes. Most of my night tonight I was just laying low and taking it easy. I took some ibprofin to
take some of the pain away. Hopefully it goes away tomorrow. Dan and Kristin should be
having there baby soon. So I gotta keep a heads up for that. Thats going to be exciting. Since
the baby is expected to arrive on turkey day. Not that they are always accurate on that.
11-18-07 I woke up this morning, trying my hardest to fall back to sleep. My wish did not get
answered and I was forced to lay there and stare at the ceiling. I watched the vikings game and
it was pretty bad watching them suck again. I am surprised they didn't blow it. If they havn't
had any trick plays this year or their defense scoring points this team would be in major trouble.
with all the turnovers they should have lost that game. Tarvaris jackson will be on the bench by
next year. I am sure we will draft a new qb this spring. I went to Ikea to do some shopping
today. I bought a whisk and a baking dish. Lame I know. I had to waste some time while Susan
got off of work. I was feeling fancy and I wanted to try somewhere new, so we went to Ciao
Bella. It was alot nicer of a place then I thought it was going to be. I got a $10 wine glass,
nothing special. I forgot what it was called. Our bill was around $100 with tip. It was a nice place
though. We had alot of catching up to do since we were unable to hang out the pass few days.
We went to majors to get some drinks. It was fun, i sure needed this night away from my
11-17-07 it sure was cold today. Not sure if my window was open last night or what. Today
started off a bit slow. I was moving very slow. I didn't even get to eat lunch. I was buy catching
up on my tv shows from the week. Me and Andy went to go watch Beowulf at the Rosedale
theater. It was alright, it was pretty cool looking but some things just didn't seem right, or was
out of place. I am sure if you read the book it would make more sence and would fit it better.
We went tot he Roseville VFW since Uncle Chunk was playing for the troops and things like
that. They had it down stairs, I wasn't sure how busy it would be. It wasn't heavilly promoted or
anything. They placed the standard cover songs and a few old ones. It was a decent show I
would say. I didn't get overly drunk though. I was feeling a bit full from eating all the nachos at
the movie. I love nachos.
11-16-07 It really didn't even feel like Friday to me at all. It felt more like maybe a Tuesday. I
went to the mall and had lunch by my self. I tried to do some shopping, but I didn't find
anything to special. I ate at some japanese place, it was ok, nothing special. I didn't eat all o my
food. I guess I have been trying to eat less again. I fluctuate in weight much more then the
average person would. I got home and just got ready for tonight. I was feeling a bit tired, but I
had to suck it up. I met up with Jamie and Chris at the VFW. We had a couple drinks there. We
made out way to the Dive Bar and met up with Andy and Jenni. The first annual Tony Cu Day
was off and running. The place hasn't really changed much. They just added some neon lights
and plasmas and called it a new name. Prices were nice and two for ones aren't too bad. They
were top shelf so that was good. Took pictures, bs'ed and stared at people. Fun times.
Unfortunately I had to hit the dance floor since I had a bet and the dang dj happened to play it.
damn you DJ Indy!!!!
11-15-07 I was so tired this morning. I had to once again roll out of bed. I have been extremely
tired as of late. Today seemed a bit slow for me. I was tired and everything I was doing was
lagging. Some good news. I want to get a copy of "The Office' season one. I never really had a
chance to watch it, but I am borrowing the dvd from a co-worker. So thats going to be great. I
jsut feel so dumb, when people talka bout the show and I don't know anything. The only thing
I know about it, my friend Kristin looks like Pam from that show. Tonight was my night of. i was
so tired from just the busy week. I can't even figure out what to do next. So it was just nice to
stay home and do some laundry. I was looking into one of those strip mall gyms, like snap
fitness or anytime. I didn't sign up or anything. Just checking it out. With it being colder now. I
don't think I want to be outside working out.
11-14-07 I wish I would have noticed it sooner, but I really thought it was tomorrow. Today
has been claimed as Tony Day!!! Its my 2 year anniversary at work. I can't think of the last job
where I have stayed pretty long at a job. Sunglass hut was off and on, and so was Dairy Queen
and Daytons at the time. Tcf bank was only a year and a half. How times have changed. I have
ate in 3 days in a row now. I brought food from home and I didn't go out. I am quite proud of
my self. I just dont feel like eating to much greasy food lately. I think its causing my breakouts. I
went to the VFW to see how well I would do tonight. I did great I got 2nd place. Me and Joe
both had good hands, his pocket 8's vs my Ace, ten. I had an Ace on the flop but he hit his
other 8. I thought I had it won, only to have it ripped away. Hahaha, he could have atleast let
me win. Joe won like over $500 in pulltabs. All I wanted was a petty $70 for first place. J/k Joe :)
I played Buck Hunter with Heidi and Mitch. I was behind until I made the greatest come from
behind round in history of Buck Hunter.
11-13-07 I felt so dumb this morning when I woke up. It was 10:30am. I totally forgot to set
my alarm last night. I was going to call in sick, but I was feeling motivated today. Work went by
pretty past. I think I drank more diet coke then I have ever in a one day span. I feel fat on coke
haha. The dodgeball email was sent out. I looked at it and decided I would stay in retirement. It
was somewhere in Hopkins on a Sunday night. Plus the fees were jacked up and its only 7
weeks. Its just not going to be the same. Later tonight, I got home and made some food. I was
feeling a bit bored and I had to do something. I guess I do cook out of boredom, weird huh. I
went bowling tonight. I sucked horribly. I wasn't any good at all. At the same time, I was
bowling from the right side compared to the left side. Figured I was trying it out. Went to the
vfw in white bear lake to visit Joe. I havn't seen hi in awhile. So I had to visit and catch up. I got
home tonight and I was so tired. I knew for once when I hit the pillow. i will be out like a baby.
11-12-07 Not sure why everyone thinks I have a girlfriend lately. I guess i will just go with the
flow. Anyways, Today I was going through every aisle at Cub Foods looking for yeast. I never
had to buy yeast before. So I was a bit lost and confused. Todays experiment was making
pizza, from scratch dough and all. Well the dough was a bit of an issue. It was a bit sticky. Once
I dried it up. I was working on t he sauce. I was rushing, since I wanted to get to watch my tv
shows. The pizza turned out great. I was very happy with it. I don't have any baking skills so
working with flour was great. I took a picture of it. I was amazed. I watched my favorite NBC
lineup. Chuck, Heroes and Journeyman, even though Journey back kinda sucks. I didn't get a
chance to run around the block tonight. I was so busy and I just had to much to do tonight.
Some times I feel I don't have enough time during the day. Maybe thats why I created the
whole website thing in the first place to have everyone check up on me. Nah, I did it cause I
had to waste time during the Evelyn era.
11-11-07 I had a big head ache this morning. i didn't even drink barely. I think it was just too
cold and my head was frozen. I felt special today, everyone wanted me in their presence. I
spent most of the day at my brothers house for my sisters b-day party. I stopped at dairy
Queen to do my part and get the ice cream cake. I watched the vikings suck ass. I don't even
have much to say about them anymore. I played with my nephews and it seems like I am going
to get stuck cooking thanks giving dinner again. I got home and watched some more football.
Well atleast the 2nd games. I ended up going to Saxon to get some bowling done. Cy and
Mindy wanted me to go. I did sucky and great. The two games i bowled, I got a 119 and my
second game I got a 184. I went to Cub foods to get some shopping done. I wanted to not eat
out for lunch this week. We shall see how I do on that. I am sure I will screw that up. I made
some food tonight. Hopefully I remember to bring it to work tomorrow.
11-10-07 I woke up very early today. I just couldn't fall back to sleep. I guess its a good thing
anyways. I went to the VFW cause I wanted to participate in the meat raffle. I didn't win any
meat and i was a bit sad about that. I didn't sign up for the chili contest. I chickened out, but
my lame excuse was I didn't have time. I got home and I fell asleep. I went to the Vfw. I knew I
had time to waste. Since later that night, I had to drive all the way down to burnsville. Anyways
I made it to the finalt able, but lost. Chris won it finally. It was his first ever vfw victory. We both
went to Burnsville bowl to meet up with everyone down there. Susan was typical susan, and
katie was typical Katie. It was good bonding time with chris anyways tonight. I havn't talked to
him in awhile. I was so tired tonight, I didn't get home till about 2:30am.
11-09-07 It was pretty busy today. I was fully occupied. For lunch we went to some place
called Keegans. It was alright, the waitress was so flirting with me. She was trying to get us to do
shots for lunch. Too bad she failed. i wasn't in the mood to flirt, I have left the flirting at home
lately. I got home and I was just cleaning up. I picked up Katie and we met up with Mario and
Danielle downtown at Oceanaire. We have waited so long for this moment. I was so excited, i
wasn't sure what to expect. The food was just amazing. We totally pigged out. The
atmosphere was just nice, I miss dressing up to go out to eat. I havn't done anything like that
since, i dunno maybe prom haha. We got a big discount, with out the discount it would have
been over $500. I got fish, it was about $36 bucks. It was decent though. We went to Rapid
city afterwards and got some drinks.
11-08-07 I was just thinking how much of a retro week this week was. i sent alot of emails to
people I have lost track of. Well, atleast the ones I stopped emailing or they stopped emailing
me cause they were mad at me or what not. Either way, its that time of year I let by gones be
by gones. I know, most of the time I don't make sense and after reading that. I dont think I
made sense either. My stomach was feeling crappy all day. Every time I eat food now, I just
want something light. After work today I went to Cub foods and bought food for my chili i am
going to make. I want to enter in the VFW chili soup of thing. I bought ground beef, turkey,
celery, chili powder, paprika, green peppers, red peppers, onions, kidney beans, corn, tomatos
and some other seasoning. Every thing went well. I wasn't sure how it was going to taste, I
wanted it to be spicy, so I had to goto the asian market and get some spicy peppers. I let it
cook for about an hour and it just tasted great. I wasn't sure how people would like it. I went to
the Legion to play some poker, I havn't done that in a long time. Since I have been busy with
sports on Thursdays.
11-07-07 I think i woke up with my face being numb, it sure was cold this morning. i got up a
bit early. I had alot of things I needed to do this morning. I had to drive home early this
morning. I just miss my bed. Today i felt pretty bad. I have been missing out on lunch with
Kate for a while. It seems like every time we have something scheduled. I seem to be busy or
something. I went to best buy with Danielle and Mario. Danielle needed a new router for her
home. I was tempted to buy some things at best buy since I have about $100 worth of gift
cards there. I went to the mall to do some shopping and I went and had happy hour
afterwards. We talked about alot of different things. Things got cut short since she had to goto
soccer, but I just made my way to the vfw after I got the bill. I already had like 4 long islands,
so I was feeling pretty good. I lost at the consolation table and I went home. I was feeling tired
and I just needed some rest tonight. From here on out, this should just get more and more
11-06-07 I have been getting complaints, that I havn't had to much detail in my journals lately.
I guess the truth is, there is something keeping me away from extra info lately. Therefor, my
journals have been even lamer then normal haha. I was extra busy at work today. I wanted to
go jogging today, but it was just so cold out. I don't mind the cold , but its the damn wind I
cant handle. Tomorrow I begin my journey to begin losing more weight then normal. I was
bored so I made lunch for tomorrow. Its basically just a simple pork and noodle dish, with some
meat and butter/garlic and other seasoning. i just can't believe I was home tonight. Seems like I
was out so much last week I couldn't catch up on anything. I stopped working out, cause
every time I was working out I broke out on my face. So I am just sticking to cardio. This
should be a pretty exciting week though. I should be booked the rest of the way. If you ever
get bored, goto youtube.com and type in Esmee Denters. I guess shes supposed to be the
next big thing in the music industry.
11-05-07 I felt pretty cold this morning. For food today, I had KFC buffet again. Seems like I
keep going there. After work today, I finally had a chance to go home and just relax. Last week,
I barely went home at all. I was just buys being out all over the place. With my sports done for
this fall. i have no sporting activities at all. So I am not sure what I will be doing. Hopefully I can
jog more and get into better shape. I have been eating alot lately. I just need to slow it down a
bit. I watched all my favorite tv shows tonight. I went to Big V's on University for Mikes band
concert gig thing. It wasn't too bad, plus it was nice seeing everyone again. I just couldn't stay
late. They had a late show and it was getting past my bed time. I am tired.
11-04-07 I woke up this morning feeling a bit sick. I woke up way to early and I couldnt get
back to bed at all. Me and Lawrence went to Ihop, since Roth was plying dead on the floor. He
was in pretty bad shape. Once we got back to the hotel, we were all set to leave town. It only
took us about 5 hours or less this time to get home. We listened tot he Vikings game for most
of the car ride. I was happy and I got home and watched the Colts and patriots game. It was a
very good game. I went to the Legion for poker. I sucked right away. I wasn't getting the cards
and I tried to bluff some lady who was playing everything. Cause she didn't know what she was
doing. It was kinda lame. I got homr tonight and went to bed early. I am just tired from the
whole weekend and I need rest. My body is sore and I took a hard fall that I might have injured
my ribs. Its healing so I should be ok. Right now, I have no sports to keep e busy. I need to
stay in shape though
11-03-07 Hotel breakfast is always so crappy to me. We got to the field so early. Before 9am I
think. Our game was at 10:30am. When it came down to game time. We lost 3 to 1. We
scored early, but our offense didn't get going and since its only 7 innings, we didn't have
enough to score points. We watched most of the other games. We had lunch at some pizza
place right across the street. For dinner we went to chili's. After that, it was of to Long Wons,
where they have the end of season party. It was pretty expensive this year. $20 bucks for free
food and beer. It was ok, this year but it was really busy. i played some tippy cup game I never
played before. I went home early again. Once I get a certain amount of alcohol in me. i just shut
off and don't want anymore. I guess this is a good thing.
11-02-07 I woke up real early to get everything ready for the big trip to Milwaukee. I was
getting nervous about the trip. I just wanted to be extra organized. I got to TIES and did all the
preparing there. We all met up here and off we went to Milwaukee. It was a long 5 hours. We
stopped in tomah for lunch. Russ was there surprisingly. We got to Milwaukee and we spent a
half an hour driving around town to find a target, since some of us needed swim trunks for the
hot tub. We went to the fields for the skills competition. It was a bit cold, but I made it through.
After that for dinner it was Long john Silvers. We went to the hotel bar afterwards. I was feeling
lazy and tired. So I went to the hotel room early. Somewhere around 11pm at night. figured it
would be a long day tomorrow.
11-01-07 Its always good to have backup plans in life. I seem to not have one at the moment.
ok I lied, I actually do have a plan, and thats to just be financially ok, when the time comes. I
have been thinking of what I can do to just make my self feel better about things lately. I went
to pizza hut today. Me and Danielle, filled out a survey and we got a $20 gc for it to pizza hut. I
thought that was pretty cool. I went to Fridays after work to have happy hour. It was just me
and heather and it was cool, we got to bond. Went to the corner bar for a quick drink. We won
our last game of the season tonight. 12 to 7. It was another close game, but our defense held
them. Went back to the corner bar and things got a bit awkward for me. But I am proud of
Dan for just letting it go. Things could have gotten real bad. I just want to have a relaxing